July 1, 2008
How
are we to act towards a brother or sister in Christ who refuses to repent of
their sinful lifestyle, who stubbornly rejects all help and godly counsel, and
persists in some rebellious sinful lifestyle?
SIMPLE:
Obey 1
Corinthians 5:9-13 and 2 Thessalonians 3:13-15! 1 Corinthians 5:9-13 KJV -
"I wrote unto you in an epistle NOT TO COMPANY with fornicators: Yet not
altogether with the fornicators of this world, or with the covetous, or
extortioners, or with idolaters; for then must ye needs go out of the world. But
now I have written unto you NOT TO KEEP COMPANY, IF ANY MAN THAT IS CALLED A
BROTHER be a fornicator, or covetous, or an idolater, or a railer, or a
drunkard, or an extortioner; WITH SUCH AN ONE NO NOT TO EAT... THEREFORE PUT
AWAY FROM YOURSELVES THAT WICKED PERSON."
Now
the same verses from "The Message" translation: "I
wrote to you in my earlier letter that YOU SHOULDN'T MAKE YOURSELVES AT HOME
AMONG THE SEXUALLY PROMISCUOUS... I am saying that YOU SHOULDN'T ACT AS IF
EVERYTHING IS JUST FINE WHEN ONE OF YOUR CHRISTIAN COMPANIONS IS PROMISCUOUS or
crooked, is flip with God or rude to friends, gets drunk or becomes greedy and
predatory. YOU CAN'T JUST GO ALONG WITH THIS, TREATING IT AS ACCEPTABLE
BEHAVIOR... God decides on the outsiders, BUT WE NEED TO DECIDE WHEN OUR
BROTHERS AND SISTERS ARE OUT OF LINE AND, IF NECESSARY, CLEAN HOUSE."
2
Thessalonians 3:13-15 - "But ye, brethren, be not weary in well doing. And
if any man obey not our word by this epistle, NOTE THAT MAN, AND HAVE NO COMPANY
WITH HIM, THAT HE MAY BE ASHAMED. Yet count him not as an enemy (Greek - do not
hate him), but admonish him (Greek - warn him) as a brother." So, in
summary, how are we to handle a longstanding Christian friend or a grown
Christian child of our own, if they choose to persist in some sinful lifestyle?
CUT OFF ALL FELLOWSHIP AND CONTACT WITH THEM, AND TELL THEM WHY YOU ARE DOING IT
AS A WARNING!
This
is not to say we should sever relationships with every Christian who stumbles
and gets tripped up into some sin by the devil. To do so would be against God's
counsel in Galatians
6:1 which says, "Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are
spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself,
lest thou also be tempted."
But
the scriptures I have quoted above are telling us how to act towards a Christian
who doesn't even try to recover themselves, who spurns all help, who defiantly
rejects the advice and prayers of counselors, and who boldly parades their sin
as if they were not accountable to God or anyone else.
THIS
KIND OF BELIEVER IS THE ONE TO BREAK ALL FELLOWSHIP WITH, in hopes that God will
get their attention and they will not lose their relationship with the Lord
altogether.
Notice that the prodigal son's father in Luke chapter 15 did not argue with his
rebellious son when he wanted to leave. I am sure that the father had tried over
and over again to help the young man and to model a godly lifestyle before him.
But the prodigal's father eventually DISCERNED that his son's rebellion and
stubbornness had gone too far. He knew that his son was going to have to learn
his lessons the hard way by going all the way down to the pig-pen. So the father
simply let him go and had zero contact with his son until he came to his senses
again.
The
son at this time had zero respect for his father anyhow and was now
self-absorbed with his own agenda. The father realized that his son would have
to RUN HEAD LONG INTO AUTHORITY LIKE A MACK TRUCK, and he had to trust the Lord
to keep his boy alive during the process. He knew he had a covenant with God
that said, "I will bring back your children from exile." He indeed
awaited expectantly for his son to return in his right mind, but was also
realistic about the time that might be required for God to work the sin out of
his son's heart. He saw that his son had surrounded himself with the wrong
people, and that it would take the Holy Spirit to open his child's eyes over a
period of time. This was a hard path to take, for the father's heart was tender
toward his son. But it HAD to be done if he were to ever see his son again!
The
prodigal's father was forced to take the TOUGH LOVE strategy, as we would term
it today! The tough part? Weeks, then months, and then maybe years passed. And
the Good News? It worked! The very second his boy came to his senses and showed
fruits of repentance, the father SHOWERED the now grown man with mercy and
forgiveness, instantly restoring him to a place of dignity and belonging!
Dear Father,
Help us to
remain loving but firm in our commitment to you and obey the word. Help us not
to use love to condone sin and rebelliousness but use love to bring about truth
into the lives of others and stand in “tough love” to help set our brothers
and sisters free from their erroneous mindsets and thinking. Thank you for the
word always being the standard for our lives. Help us Lord to know that he whom
the Lord loves He chastens and he whom He calls son He scourges. Help us to
endure your tough love to bring all of us to the place we need to be in you.
Amen!
Darrel
Mason